Women and sexuality

I love how the Bible is a breath of fresh air to pending cultural norms and mores. Especially churchy ones. When we look at the Bible most of the women present have shady and broken sexual pasts, and yet, God does not shy away from using them, honoring them, incorporating them as important and powerful players in his story.

I like the story of Tamar. The one who seduces her father in law so that she can have social status after her husband dies. She conceives twins, one of whom is Jesus' great forfather from the line of Judah.  That's right, ladies, there is sort of a weird undercurrent in the Bible that sort of says: Women, you must take your sexuality in your own hands; reclaim it if you will, for God's glory. NOT MAN's. Because remember, it probably was because of a man's (ego, pride, selfishness, lust, sin, lack of respect) you ended up in the predicament in the first. (Men, you are not known for caring well for women's sexuality- deal with the criticism).

Then there is Ruth who's sketchy behavior in the during the harvest landed her a husband. Or Ester, who for all intents and purposes became a trophy wife. Rahab- a prostitute. Mary- a pregnant 14 year old. Hagar, a sex slave by some definitions. The woman at the well- a man eater. AND THE LIST GOES ON.

Women, we have some spiritual heritage with sexually broken women. And they are STRONG sexually broken women. And they were honored and loved by GOD ( and yeah, still found a godly man to do life with) in spite of it.

In fact, I think God in his weird, twisted, higher than thou ways, uses our sexuality, broken, abused, shamed, guilt-ridden, terrifying as it is, to HIS GLORY. To show His LOVE as a father(and mother- like a hen to her chicks, there are feminine aspects of God's character that should help us identify with His all non-gendered being). Christ was crucified, sacrificed, broken for us to take away our shame and our guilt- to reconcile us to God. And CHRIST was a PRODUCT of some weird sexual mores.

Let us not then be afraid of sexuality, or of its brokenness, but let God redeem it and use it and know We are well Loved for it. That is to say, figure out how to be empowered by your own story. Let God take the guilt, the shame, the fear, the what have you and SHINE FORTH like your sisters and mothers in Christ.

The end.

2 steps forward one step back

I recently read " Lean In" by Sheryl Sandberg and am so glad I did. She articulates so much of what my experience has been in some ways about ambitions and a professional life that I am in awe and extremely grateful for all that she had to share. I think I want to be her someday in some somewhat modified capacity.

And am applying what she says women need to do more: lean in, stay at the table, engage, push, put ourselves out there, and not doubt our abilities or confidence.

Applying this of course is extremely out of my comfort zone- I am such a "tiara" mode people pleaser kind of worker. And so, I've babystepped putting myself more out there and not all of it has been successful. Failure is a big part of learning, but I think I am gaining ground and know that putting myself out there, pushing myself to speak up and add to the conversation 'at the table' will better for me than not.

So it's a few steps forward, a couple steps back sort of dance, but I think I'm getting somewhere. I just have to learn that manly trait of 'not caring' so much (just get it done) so that I won't crumble or lose my nerve!